Diversions, distractions and retirement

When will I really learn how to retire? And by that I mean when will I give myself permission to relax a bit more, sleep a bit later, read a book during the day? I find that I am still driven to be in my studio during "work hours" and then some. And, while I enjoy my time I do feel guilty if I do not maintain a routine. I do not think that this is healthy.
I expressed this sentiment to my 88 year old mom who is still pursuing creative endeavors, and her answer made some sense. She told me that retirement is the freedom to decide what it is I want to do- and if I want to be in the studio, so be it.... I like that answer- but I am not sure that I put it into practice. Perhaps that is because I am in the process of endlessly sewing 1/8" rows of stitching on a new piece, and this is not my favorite part of the process.

My diversions and distractions tend to involve either travel or renovation. This spring I redid two bathrooms at our farmhouse. And I obsessed, and I do mean obsessed over every little detail from tiles to fixtures to the right color shower drain. And while the showers are now fantastic- I do know that it was a huge time suck that made me nervous. I ordered samples from Mexico, Turkey, Sand Francisco, and spent way too much time worrying.

Another obsession is travel. Dave and I are going to go to Morocco for two weeks. We were there 35 years ago and had a wonderful time. Now he is being invited to speak so we get free airfare and hotel for one week. But I spent so much time figuring out the right places to stay, the cutest riads, the most value and charm for the buck. I was living on Tripadvisor and Booking.com for endless hours. And while I am thrilled to be going back again, I was not feeling great about the amount of time I spent researching stupid stuff. 

This is the first time that I am accompanying my husband on one of this business trips. I am nervous about that- I am not sure how I am going to feel being the "wife". It is not something I am used to. And I will have three days alone to occupy myself. Luckily there is a large arts festival in the town we are staying at- so that will be fun. And I am hoping to learn about Moroccan textiles.

So this is a foray into one part of retirement that I have not seen. It has to be more interesting than machine quilting endless lines.... perhaps I am ready....