Un-multi-tasking

Celebration?

Ice cream, speeches, and tears. 

Driving home I called my mother and Jody, naturally crying, and they both asked, " So are you celebrating?" 

This so seems like the wrong word. "Celebrating" seems so happy, yet what I feel is really excitement, sorrow, anticipation, fear, anxiety and the sense that I am ready to start this new adventure. But "celebration" connotes that I am happy about leaving. How can I be happy about leaving close friends, wonderful colleagues, a group that is wishing me well- not a one voicing jealousy. 

In all the years that I have been at Grafik, with all the farewell speeches that I have given, I have never been the one leaving- until today. And even though it is temporary, I, for the first time get to feel what all those leaving Grafik have felt- a curious blend of joy and sorrow. Finally I sense the mixed emotions Jonathan, Kristin, Jim, Claire, Fabio,  Cheryl, Ned, Michael, and today, Lindsay, all must have felt, leaving a close family of colleagues to embark on something exciting in their lives. I don't think any of them would have chosen the word, "celebration". Neither do I. 

Tomorrow the adventure begins.
by JudyK