Un-multi-tasking

Dissonance

I find that recently I can either blog or I can work on my pieces. With limited extra time I have had to choose one. But I have also found that ignoring one effects the other. Without an outlet- my writing- I lose important thoughts and feelings. Without my art, I lose myself. So for the last month I have chosen me figuring that lost thoughts and feelings would find their way into my pieces. And I think they have.

It's been a dark month. I had to say goodbye to a life long friend who has worked with me for well over 20 years. R was perhaps the essence of the "old" Grafik- and his absence has been felt. With R gone- the office is lonelier- and just not as friendly. It has been hard walking by his vacant office ten times a day.
I have spent an inordinate amount of time in the office clocking in 50-65 hour days and weekends fretting over the firm, and one website in particular. It has sapped some of my creative energy- but I have given the office the focus it needs from me.
So my work has been darker- more tense and a bit angry. I've been working in very dark shades- and slashing my fabrics again- out of anger, anxiety, and maybe a tad of self-pity.

And the piece is really coming along. It is large, ( yes I hear you Nancy!) and every single line is thought out and composed. Randomness with purpose.
I am  cutting circles into the lines an I have been slashing the pieces horizontally and working on smaller sections. That way I am not trying to lay in pieces to a 6' x 8' of fabric. It is pretty slow going with me only getting to 3-4 lines a day. Seems like it should move faster but it has not.
Today I cut in two lines of a bright orange- loud and screaming. I was worried about the effect but it is working- and lends even more dissonance to the composition- which is what I am aiming for.
Maybe everything in life has some kind of purpose. I know that this piece is born out of the pain of losing R. So if some good comes out of bad... here it is.